If I implied there's an easy solution, that would be massively incorrect. It's excruciating. Blaming myself is much easier. Changing what I do is much easier.
I don't give up on my kids. Period. No matter what. I have excellent relationships with all of them. But we had some horrific experiences that left us traumatized; and it took everything we had to hold on.
Some people hurt kids who end up in other families who don't know the extent of the damage. We are left picking up the pieces and figuring it out on the go.
Pretending these strong feelings don't exist would be hypocritical and unhelpful to those who are struggling.
Knowing what to watch out for could save families and lives.
Those who have been there know.
I never thought I'd be one of them, but I made it.