Have a Pet Narcissist who won’t Stop Peeing on the Rug? You’re Probably Doing One Thing Wrong

Elizabeth Park
9 min readJun 7, 2024

Stop it NOW and salvage the rest of your life

girl looking closely at skeleton
Photo by cottonbro studio: https://www.pexels.com/photo/holiday-couple-love-people-5547066/

Whether you found him online, at church, a pub, a pickleball court, or through a mutual friend, you ended up adopting him, bringing him home, and feeding him.

He was way more expensive to keep than you ever dreamed. He bit you a lot, but pretended he was just playing. He was demanding and needy and didn’t live up to the dreams you had in your head about how you were going to go on walks and trips and car rides and stuff.

But worst of all, he kept peeing on your priceless Moroccan rug. The one you can never replace. It’s getting faded and threadbare from all the cleaning. It low-key stinks. People don’t want to come over anymore.

You don’t even want to live there anymore. You need to sell, but you can’t, because of the pee. It will take a deep-cleaning and a really good stager.

In the end, you can’t keep him. No matter how hard you try. If you do, he won’t just be peeing on the rug. He’ll flood the house or set it on fire and walk away like the little girl in the meme.



Elizabeth Park

Van Gogh fan girl, loves good questions and people who listen, ex-fundamentalist; Spiritual life coach for black sheep salvagingyourstory.com